Questions I wished we’d discussed?

Having a baby is a wonderful, beautiful but exhausting chapter in our lives and it can be one of the most trying periods in even the happiest of relationships. Your daily routine changes can leave you feeling unprepared for the challenges ahead. Have you ever thought about talking about the things that may crop up during those months in advance of the baby arriving? It may help you make repairs to your relationship easier and faster so you can get back to the joy of being together as a family. Having clear and open communication with your partner and a ‘game plan’ can help. It’s never too late to start these discussions. ⁠

First start by sitting down and asking what did you like about how you were raised and plan to include in your parenting, then three to five things you did not like and plan to avoid. This can be a great starting point to discuss values and parenting styles. Then move on to start by asking the questions you think may prop up in the first few months of the new-born arriving, a few examples we thought might help to get you started?

• What are your thoughts on co-sleeping, sleep training, and crying it out?
• How long would you like to try and breast feed for? If there are challenges in this area have you thought of a support system to help you through these?
• Thoughts on religion?
• Thoughts on discipline?
• How can we support Mum's postpartum body with body positivity?
• How will we spend non-working downtime?
• How we will deal with any financial strain?
• How to stay connected sexually after the baby is born?
• How to talk to either partner if they think there is a mental health imbalance?
• How do you share parenting duties in the first few months to give both partners some downtime?
• The role of grandparents and building a support system?
• How to cope with night waking’s and sleep deprivation?
• Would you consider postpartum support from a local doula or child-minder?

Hopefully talking about these questions in advance will help you provide the greatest gift you can give your child - a strong relationship between you and your partner.